Confrontation

[Ndale]

Ndale was furious. He stalked down the hall. This was stupid. This was really really stupid. He gripped his Halloween mask in his hand tightly, not having bothered putting it back on after having removed it talking with Shae. Of course, the boy's reaction had been less than desirable and more than over dramatic and highly infuriating. A loud, snarling growl ripped from his throat as he turned to face the door to their dorm room. His tail, trapped against his leg in his pants to compliment his costume, was trying to flick angrily, and it only added to his irritability when it couldn't.

If Shae was in here, he was going to be getting a seriously angry cat in his face. If he was gone, well then, Ndale would make sure to be gone before Shae returned. Already he was pulling at the collar of his shirt. This stupid, horrid costume! He wanted to be rid of it entirely. He should have never gone to that ball. The boy gripped the handle and practically ripped the door open, stalking in and slamming it closed behind him, chucking his mask in the general direction of his trunk angrily. A string of growls streamed from his throat, his bright amber eyes positively livid.

[Shae-Lantern]

Shae had gone straight to his room on pure instinct.
He didn't even know why though.
He couldn't see how this was a good place to be.
Yet at the same time... his stuff was here.

Waves of emotion were coarsing through his body like wild fire.
He was feeling hurt and almost betrayed by the incident, but more powerful was the sense of guilt and the overpowering shame.
And he felt shocked and angry, incredibly angry.
And he was directing that towards Ndale. This was all Ndales Fault.
But he knew really, that it was himself that he was furious with.
Why hadn't he been watching what he did and said?!
Why had he taken it so far?
...Why hadn't he realised sooner.
Why hadn't he Realised sooner?!
He felt weak, sick in the stomach, and he just wanted it to all go away.
He could barely think.

He almost fell down, kneeling beside his suitcase.. rummaging around.. but he didn't know what for.
Cloths.
A book or two.
More cloths.
... His knife.
His hand closed around its hilt and he paused.
It wasn't hard.

Just a simple cut.
A flick of the wrist.. or maybe a few.
Yes just a simple motion and he could stop thinking about all this.
He could sink into the comforting darkness of pain.. and eventually delirium as he lost enough blood.
No.. it wasn't hard.
Nothing to it.
Just a cut.
A simple cut
Easy.

He sat backwards holding the knife in his hand.
Contemplating.
Ndale had told him to be careful.
But now.. would he even care?
Did it matter..
Why should he care about himself, just because Ndale might?

As he had sat there the door burst open with Ndale making his entry, causing shae to jump back slightly, leaning onto his hands in surprise.
Taken of guard by the sudden entry... He couldn't help letting every emotion he was feeling show plainly on his face- coupled with a badly hidden look of doing something he knew Ndale would reproach.

((OMG I'M SO SO SORYY!! Yesterday when I hit send the internet stuffed up and wouldnt reconnect >>... but i think it sounds better now iv rewritten it anyway..))

[Ndale]

Sharp, predatory eyes snapped to the other boy in the room, narrowing dangerously. The loud growling settled to a unconscious rumble in his chest, fed with every breath he took. Looking over the form of the boy seated on the ground, the light hitting the blade caught the cheetah's attention. He stared at the handle grasped and his lips pulled back into a cold sneer, baring his canines as his hackles raised. Ndale scoffed harshly, disgust and sour amusement at the situation rather obvious.

"What are you doing?" His voice was low and laced in his growl, tone more acrid than it had ever been talking to Shae. "Tell me, are you angry enough that you were thinking about hurting someone else, or weak enough that you were thinking about hurting yourself?" The feline's expression was bitter, brow creased and angled, eyes hard. His disapproving gaze lingered on Shae's face and he tried to not read the emotions displayed there. He was not loosing his anger this time. He would not bend this time. Shae was going to hear him out.

Tearing his attention away, Ndale slipped off his shoes and crouched to roll up his right pant leg to reveal white bandages wrapped around the limb. As he tore them off with fury, it released his tail, which he then set about pulling out the top of his pants to let it settle in it's normal fashion behind him. It sliced through the air angrily as it flicked, the fur standing on end as he stood back up.

"Shae, I don't get it! What the hell do you want?! I tried doing everything tonight to make sure I kept my promises. I stayed out of your way so you could whatever you wanted with whomever, I even went so far as to hide myself so that you wouldn't see me around and feel guilty or whatever else you feel that may have ruined your fun. I came and got the last dance exactly as I said I would, and I was planning on meeting you back here. What part of that wasn't what you had said you wanted?!" Ndale raised and snapped his hands down in frustration, snarling and voice elevating to drop again for a last low statement. "Or was it just that you had finally decided on who to try, and when you found out it was me you were disappointed?"


(( x3 S'okay.
D'aw, sorry, Ndale's being mean. ))

[Shae-Lantern]

He flinched away, his emotions only becoming more and more potent as he was chastised by the older boy.
He only felt more ashamed at being called weak, but more so it fueled his anger.
How dare Ndale make that judgement about him. How could he possibly have ANY idea how Shae felt at that moment. He didn't understand, he wasn't going through all the pain and suffering that Shae had been enduring for decades.
How DARE he call Shae weak.
He glared acidly as Ndale unstrapped his tail, not saying a word.
Afraid to speak for fear of what he might say.

And then he had to look away again.
He just couldn't meet the older boys eye as he listened to everything he DIDN'T want to hear.
Because it was all true, true to the word. Ndale had kept everyone one of his promises.. he just... hadn't done it in the way Shae had expected. At all.
Sure he hadn't stopped Shae but.. he'd made him feel like an absolute idiot instead.
At least that's what he felt like now. And not only that but now it was too late to take any of his words or actions back. They were already done in the moment and was full of dread for what might come now as consequence.

"You.." he started, standing up, but not letting go of the knife, still looking away. "You're right.. you kept every promise." he sniffed and swallowed to keep his voice steady and to try and stop himself from loosing control, his long hair hanging limply in front of his face. He paused.. not saying anything.. because he just didn't know what to say, how to express his feelings.. how to express his fear.
"I.. I guess.. I'm.." he swallowed a second time, his voice obviously restrained as he tried to figure out the words he needed and at the same time not go on an angry outburst. "I'm just.... I'm.."
He let out a breath of air he'd been keeping in something of a sigh..
the words just would not come to him.

[Ndale]

Ndale stayed standing rigidly, glaring heatedly in silence as the other boy stood and spoke. The African cat's eyes flicked warily to the knife that Shae still held, it was a hunter's reflex but he didn't actually think they boy would stab him. Hearing Shae stumble over words he quickly became annoyed.

"You're...you're-" He mocked giving a roll of his eyes. "You're clueless Shae. Do you have any idea how much I am willing to do for you?" The feline stalked forward intimidatingly. "Do you have any idea how much I-" love you. And it was rather like the air from his lungs had been taken before he could get out the last two words. An almost pained look crossed his face and the anger visibly drained from his eyes, hackles falling and tail practically falling dead in it's movement. What the hell was he saying? Love Shae? He...well...

Ndale's brow creased again, but it was obvious it was only an attempt to bring back some of his lost anger. "No. Of course you don't. But...it's my fault anyway." He huffed and turned sharply. He grabbed his backpack and turned it over on his own mattress on the floor. Bringing the empty bag to his trunk, he started rummaging through, throwing things in the pack. A single pair of pants, one shirt. He dug down under all his stuff to pack even all his cheetah gear, something he didn't usually look at or remove.

"Listen. Just see it like everyone else did. You, Od, and Larita are the only ones who know I was even there. You danced with some masked guy, you had a wonderful time, he left after the dance and disappeared, you don't know who he was." He flipped his hand in the air in between shoving things in his backpack. "No one is the wiser, be happy. As for me, I had preferred running in the fields to going to the dance and never showed up for the ball. Sound good?" Ndale didn't look up while he spoke, too busy considering one jacket over another to bring with him.

[Shae-Lantern]

He looked up glaring again, suddenly annoyed- and no longer able restrain it.
"you know what?! Yes." he snapped. "I'm clueless.. I don't understand anything about ANY of this.."
He bit his lip and swallowed back his tears.
Those oh so annoying tears.

"How can you sit there and expect me to understand ANYTHING?! It's YOU who doesn't get it."
He held his ground as Ndale walked forward, fists clenched.
"do you just NOT understand ME.. Does it just fly over YOUR head when I say you are the First person I can EVER remember caring about!!!!"
He took a step closer his voice raised and full of Acidic tones.
"doesn't that mean ANYTHING to you?! Anything at all?!... I don't know and I'm sorry I can't be as strong as you.."
He looked back down at the knife.. With a small, almost sick, humorless smile, tracing a line with it's tip, up his arm.
"But you don't have the right to judge that.. You hardly know me.. And you obviously don't know how hard I AM TRYING.. To comprehend all this... Im sorry Iv never had anyone to teach me."

He felt the tip of the knife bite into his skin as it reached his wrist and he brought it up looking at the small amount of red liquid stained there, a single drop Dripping down the blade.
"But you're leaving now.. Arent you" his voice became less snappy and lower, harder to here. "Iv 'had my chance' right?.. Well again I'm sorry- this is still new and dare I say a somewhat frightening experience for me... Nothing makes sense anymore.."

His eyes watched the slow sliding of how own blood down his blade, before bring the knife up further, his face half covered in his fringe again making it hard to read as he ran his tongue up along the sharp edge, perfectly aware that it cut him again as he did so.

[Ndale]

Ndale turned slowly, looking over his shoulder at the boy. He stood and faced Shae again, anger resurfacing inside him.

"No, Shae. I expected it mean something though!" He bit back. "I expect that if you care about me, more than just my anger will get through to you!" The feline snarled, teeth bared. "For some reason, the only way I can make an impression on you is if I get angry. I don't want to be angry with you. I am willing to help you get through any emotional barriers you have, and I am very patient, I just don't want to devote myself to you and then have you go out and flirt with some random person while saying I mean nothing!" He gestured angrily towards the door, referring to the ball. "I can handle if I really don't mean anything to you, Shae, but the least you can do is let me know."

Ndale went deathly silent as he watched the blade, visibly shaking from restraint as the blood rolled down. He growled low and sent a furious gaze at Shae.

"Fine." He spat in a hiss. In quick and stiff movements, he stalked over to the pile on the bed where he had dumped out his backpack. Picking up a bundled shirt, he unwrapped it to reveal Shae's second knife, the one he had taken a while ago from the bathroom incident. Turning back to Shae, he held it delicately to display it with a small bitter smirk and a raised eyebrow. "Shall I show you what that feels like? We'll call it a first lesson...since I don't know how else to get through to you." He flipped the knife to a firm reverse grip and dragged it up from his left hip to over his heart and towards his left shoulder, cutting open the black silk shirt of his costume, but not quite breaking the skin. He held a taunting gaze on Shae's face. "I'm not planning on leaving Shae. I don't think I could ever change my mind about you even if I wanted. The thing is, I thought...was willing, to be human for you. I'm now simply realizing that that was stupid and that doesn't matter. I may look human, I may act human...but that doesn't give me the life of one. Maybe that's a good thing. I don't understand humans, after all....you need to make sense of everything. From example, humans apparently take to hurting themselves. I don't know why, but maybe I should try it too. Find the appeal." He trailed off bitterly, realizing he was loosing the point of this and the blade hesitated just under where his collar bone met his shoulder. Ndale glanced at it and back at the knife at Shae's mouth.
"I hate it when you hurt yourself. Can you understand that?" He rather suddenly dug the tip in to his bicep, wincing and giving a slight yelping growl as the blood pooled out around the metal. The tip was only about a centimeter in, but it was enough. The feline had a tear pricking at his eye, but he steeled his expression and made no move to pull the knife away.

Ndale looked back at the knife Shae held and narrowed his eyes before readjusting his grip to twist and face the blade in towards his neck to rake across his collarbone, obviously threatening to continue if the other boy did not put his own weapon down. Hot red blood seeped in to the cloth of the shirt, the black not changing much in color, but obviously weighted down by the wetness.

[Shae-Lantern]

Every word, every sentance, every glare.
It was all just too much.
He couldn't bare it, he wanted to escape this, to get get away.
He knew he'd done something wrong, he'd realized that a lot earlier- but he didn't understand precisely what it was, or why it was wrong. He couldn't comprehend it and it was making his head hurt.

Dropping the knife in shock as Ndale cut into his own shoulder, Shae stepped backwards and buried his head in his hands. He had to block it out. All of it.
Everything.

Gaah!! He just couldn't ignore the words that had been thrown at him.
They kept repeating themselves, bouncing around his head, making him worry more, making him more ashamed, more guilty, more afraid, more angry- everything was just escalating.
He couldn't handle this.
He couldn't.

He didn't respond.
Words escaping him once again, tears falling freshly now, into is hands and running down his wrists, where they mixed with the thin trail of blood already falling there and dripping down his arm.
But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't block it out.
He couldn't block anything out.

[Himitsu]

Mitsi hesitantly raised his hand.
He looked at the door with something of determination.
He couldn't leave this any longer, he'd heard the rumours- he had good ears for this kind of thing.. when he was listening for it anyway. And he couldn't leave it to next week, not even tomorrow.
The sooner he...
He couldn't wait.

Raising his hand slightly further he knocked on the door.. the first beat slightly shy and soft, but then swallowing the last of his hesitant thoughts, more boldly.
Then he simply put his hand down and stepped back, hoping the door would open.. and if not... he'd knock again.
Simple as that.
Because, it couldn't wait.

[Ndale]

Ndale watched the knife drop and Shae back up. The way he buried his head, though, it ate at Ndale's anger. He had just...he had just seriously upset the boy. He had never wanted to be the cause of any pain for Shae. The feline glanced to the side and pulled the blade from his bicep with a wince. Silent and heavy with the weight of guilt, he tossed the knife back on to his bed and scooped up his blanket. It was a simple soft and fuzzy forest green, always on his bed. It was one of his favorites, a gift from Od. He stepped forward and paused, ashamed, before Shae.

"Shae...I'm sorry." He threw the blanket so it would hang over the boy's shoulders if he allowed it. Ndale opened his mouth to say more, but there was a knock on the door. He glanced over, hesitating once more. Making a hum of irritation, Ndale looked back to Shae. "I need to speak with you, I'll be right back, I'm going to get rid of whoever is there. But, we need to talk about this seriously." He paused again, watching Shae, before turning and crossing to the door, struggling out of his cut and bloodied shirt. He dropped it on the floor out of sight as he cracked open the door just enough to put his frame in. He looked down a little coldly, leaning against the trim. He raised an eyebrow at the little white-haired kid standing there.

"Hey." His rough voice was mostly emotionless. "Listen, now's not a good time. You're going to have to come back later." The fresh cut in his shoulder itched and stung, but it only reminded him he needed to get back to Shae. His tail swung irritably behind his legs.

[Himitsu]

Mitsi looked up as the door opened, into the face of this guy who he didn't know and for a split second his eyes widened slightly- before his expression returned to neutral. Not even his usual, pleasant smile, was in place. Just neutral.
He noted the Irritation in the voice of the stranger, but he refused to 'come back later.'
No, not later.
Now.

"You're.. Ndale, right?" he asked in a slightly hesitant tone, although he was pretty sure already that this was true. "I need to talk to you.." He looked away for a second before adding in a slightly insistand and almost firm voice -something he rarely spoke in, at least not like this- "..Now."
He wouldn't keep him long, no mucking around- he could do that later. Right now he would be straight to the point. And he wasn't going to take 'no' for an answer either.

He stepped back a few more steps, indicating he wanted to speak to the guy out there, not in the room where he could sense.. They needed to talk out there.
He felt slightly awkward with this kind if atttitude, being serious was not something he was used to. But that didn't matter, it was necessary.

[Ndale]

Ndale's eyebrow quirked up slightly and he sighed, hand coming up to run through his hair in a frustrated habit.

"Yeah, I'm Ndale." He glanced back in to the room a bit worriedly, obviously unwilling to leave. With a sharp look to Himitsu, he stepped out and closed the door softly behind him. "But this better be important." The cheetah stood tall with shoulders back and chin raised, attitude as if he were without a doubt the superior between the two, as if he deemed whether or not to allow Himitsu to speak to him. He was not in the mood to deal with this. He had to get back in to Shae. The only thing that stopped him from just telling the boy to get lost and ignore him to go back inside anyway was the fact that whoever this kid was, he seemed serious. There was also just something about him that Ndale couldn't help but like...It was, however, pushed to the back of his mind.

"You have two minutes." Ndale declared firmly, although not entirely unfriendly. "Who are you, what do you want and why do you need me right now?"

[Himitsu]

Mitsi had to bite back the urge to cower slightly, there was no denying that this guy, Ndale, was intimidating.
A lot taller, stronger, and older than Mitsi.. But this wasn't the time to let that control him.
The hesitation flickered once again across his features but he quickly banished it, taking a small but bold step forward he let his expression become more serious still, frowning slightly in a manner that hinted an almost warning tone.

He opened his mouth as if to start speaking then stopped, he wanted to chose the right words.
"You.. Had.. You had better be careful with my Oni-San." he stated finally, crossing his arms, looking up because of the height difference, but his face didn't falter again.

"Oni-San is fragile.. He.." Mitsi was speaking in a way that was cryptic to some extent, but he knew it should be plain enough for his meaning to be understood. "You have to gentle with him.. Or he.." he paused. His expression seemed to darken and he attempted to start the sentence again. "Or.."
He paused again, shaking himself, he needed to stay focused.
The dark look seemed to pass, but it only returned to his previous serious, it was almost deadly calm.
"If you abuse my brother.. If you hurt him.. I'm not helpless anymore, this time, I will kill you."
The look in his eyes wasn't joking, but the way he spoke only seemed to be mostly pointed at Ndale, and for a single moment, everything innocent and nice about the young boy seemed to vanish, revealing for a second, a much different kind of person.
Normally it would have been easy to dismiss his threat, and that moment passed very quickly, but in his eyes for that brief time, there was no question as to whether he meant that threat.

[Ndale]

Ndale was at first annoyed by the boy’s hesitance, and the quirk of his brow showed this. Then, when the boy comes out with this almost threatening posture, the feline's eyes narrowed. He tried to keep his patience as the boy stumbled through his words. Ndale didn’t know who exactly this brother was, but he didn’t like being threatened.

Despite the boy’s serious air, Ndale’s immediate reaction was a low warning growl. He stepped forward intimidatingly.

“Listen. First, I don’t know who you’re talking about, I don’t know who your brother is. Second, I don’t know you, there was no previous time for you to be referring to. Third-” He lowered his voice in a deep growl and his teeth bared. “You have a lot of nerve coming to my door and threatening to kill me.” The fact that all the innocence vanished rubbed against the cheetah’s animal instincts the wrong way and it put him on edge, even as the moment passed, the feeling lingered. The corner of his lips lifted in a sour smirk, as if amused by something rather annoying. He leaned down as if speaking to a little kid about something secret. “You’re welcome to try, little one. But, tell me. Did Brother send you here? Would he be happy you’re going to kill me or are you doing this on your own?”

Ndale’s voice was smooth and taunting, rolling in his growling purr. His canines showed through his smirk and his tail flicked sharply behind him. He straightened, signaling the questions may have been rhetoric, and turned partly to grab the door handle. Casting a last look down at Himitsu, Ndale raised an eyebrow expectantly, figuring the kid to scurry off now.

[Himitsu]

Mitsi was rather taken back, he had expected that much to be obvious.
And as he was taken aback he seemed to return mostly to normal, pouting slightly in frustration and annoyance- which wasn't in the least bit intimidating now.
He listened to Ndales taunts before hmphing and replying in a manner that mirrored his expression.

"You.. you should know who I'm talking about.. don't play dumb." he swallowed, now fighting the urge to back down again. "My Oni-San- my brother... he's.. he's very important to me.. you're lucky I'm letting you get so close to him.. So don't you dare hurt him!!"
Mitsi gestured slightly to the room Ndale was about to go into with an exasperated and adamant look.

"Ni-san is a very special person so don't you dare hurt him."
He repeated that last line again, wanting to make sure that he got through to this guy.
Making sure he understood.

[Ndale]

Ndale rolled his eyes in exasperation as the kid decided to not immediately leave and he huffed. The feline's eyes narrowed on Himitsu for his comments.

"Shae..." He glanced towards the room. "Shae is your brother..." Well, that was something new...and it stirred something strange inside that Ndale didn't like the feeling of. He found he didn't like not having known Shae had a brother. He didn't like that this kid was 'letting him get so close' to Shae. The cheetah smirked with a devious quirk of the lips and he crouched down to be on level with the boy. "See now, you have no reason to fear: I am very gentle with Shae. Besides, he can take care of himself, no? The time we did get rough, he put quite a few scratches on me. Was rather smug about it too. One of those occasions were we got very close to one another." He kept his tone light and conversational. Then it gained a hard note. "Here's the point kid, you're not letting me get close to him. I'm with Shae because Shae is letting me be close, and that's all the permission I need. He knows, the moment he tells me seriously that he doesn't want me, I will leave. On his request." Ndale growled lightly.

"What happens between your brother and me really isn't any of your business. But I don't intend to hurt the very person I care about." He paused and his expression became a tad more emotionless. "You still don't think we should be together?"

[Himitsu]

The way Ndale was talking- Or more what he was saying, made Mitsi bite his lip, indignant and angry pout returning to his face. This guy had no idea.. No idea, did he? Of course not.
How dare he speak like that.
How dare he say it was none of Mitsis business.

"tch.. It doesn't matter what you do- Oni-San won't say no.. He doesn't know how to." Mitsi glared at the guy. "You think you know him better than I do?! Don't be dumb, stupid"
He straightened up to be as tall and condescending as he could be, eyes narrowing and arms still crossed. "You know nothing about Oni-San.. You have no idea what he.. What WE have been through.. You have no right.. To talk to me like that." At this point his lip had begun to tremble, and he was starting to visibly break down.
And not break down as in giving in- he was breaking down.

"He.. He's MY brother.. MINE!!" his arms uncrossed and he stepped but fists clenched, a slightly crazed look already in his eye. "My brother and I know him better than ANYONE!!!"
Mitsi was loosing it, and it was plain to see. It was turning into one of his 'episodes.'
"you.. you know NOTHING!" he took another step back. "Nothing, Nothing... Nothing.."
As he repeated the word he seemed to deflate, putting his face in his hands, his breathing deep and course, sobbing dryly.

After a moment he sniffed and moved his hands down, back to normal and apparently unaware of what had just happened.
"just don't hurt him.. I have no quarrel with you.. If you don't hurt him."
He turned ready to walk away, his voice had also returned to normal.

((lol and if Ndale let's him he'll walk away at this point d: ))

[Ndale]

The more the kid spoke, the angrier Ndale became. His hackles rose, hair spiking on the back of his neck and base of his skull and tail. If it were any other, less beautiful and older person, the young man would have straight out socked him in the jaw. As it was, he clenched his fists. His lip curled in a snarl and he would have snapped something back, but the way the boy seemed to go temporarily insane caught him by surprise. He went rigidly still, a reflex in a sense of danger, trying not to be seen. No movement meant no provocation in most cases. It...seemed familiar, though. The way he broke and recovered like nothing was wrong.

Having to stay still, listening to this boy shout about his ignorance. The anger just boiled inside him. He felt...well, he felt like tearing something up. He wanted to hunt and for once, he wanted to be violent and malicious. Ndale ducked his head, some strange of hair falling forward to hang in his face. He didn't bother brushing them back. Feeling the boy go back to normal, the rage in Ndale wanted to explode out. Why was he holding rigidly still in front of this innocent little boy. He despised the fact that he had been forced in to a defensive position in the face of whatever the boy had just gone through. He hissed lowly under his breath, unable to keep it all bottled. He had to let some slip out.

"I'm learning." He muttered darkly under his breath. Of course he knew he didn't know everything about Shae. He hated that, he wanted to know everything, and the fact that Himitsu rubbed in the fact that he didn't did something strange. On one hand, it fed Ndale's desire to know everything. On the other...he wanted to run. Run away and just never think about it again. "Well, it doesn't matter." He sighed out, trying to deflate his anger. Placing his hands on his knees, Ndale pushed himself up from his crouch and only brushed a cold look over Himitsu before turning to the door.

"We'll just have to see, wont we? I've already put my own black collar around his neck and made a claim. If he takes to wearing it...well, he may already be mine completely, no matter what you do." His tone was low and dark, he opened the door, stepped in, and slammed it closed behind him, never looking back at the boy.

The cheetah sighed, leaning back against the wood, hanging his head. He slide down it, knees bending as his butt hit the floor, forehead coming to rest in his palms as a string of swears slipped from between his lips. God, what was he going to do? Maybe...maybe Himitsu was right?

[Himitsu]

As mitsi walked away, he couldn't block our Ndales parting words.
And he didn't like them.
He didn't like any of them.
Not one.
Not an adjective or a verb in those words did he like.
Not even a conjunction.

He could feel his eyes tearing up but he determinedly walked away.
He'd let this guy stay close to Shae.
Because so far...
So far, he hadn't hurt him.
For now.

((sorry it's short I'm just closing off lol))

[Shae-Lantern]

Shae looked up, slightly surprised as the door slammed, not having moved from where he had been standing when Ndale left. In fact.. he'd barely moved at all, his hands still up near his face, having only just removed them as he had been startled.
He sniffed and wiped his his palm across his tear streaked cheek, feeling little better than he had been before, despite the fact that Ndale seemed to have calmed down a bit.

Shae looked over as Ndale sank down to the floor with a questioning look- still hesitant to look him in the eye.
"Um.. who... who was it?" the question came out easily, because he didn't have to think about it.
Small talk, obvious question to ask, no need for any real input.
The way Ndale was now sitting and acting, apparently annoyed further in some way, was not helping how he felt either.


((aaand sorry this one is also kinda short ^^;;;;))

[Ndale]

Should he continue pursuing Shae? Should he try and get what he wanted, which was pretty much everything, from the boy? Should he just stop at what he had? Would he be hurting Shae with either of those? What about in two years?
All these questions kept spinning about in the cheetah's head. He was trying to find the best course of action, but the problem was, he knew Shae cared about it, but he didn't know how much that was. Was he considered a friend? Boyfriend? Lover? He didn't know what the boy considered him. What did he consider Shae?
Usually, once he had seduced that person, he knew how they worked, he was good at reading people, and they became uninteresting. But Shae? He did not understand, and the boy would never cease to be interesting. But...
God, he wanted to sleep, or vomit. Preferably sleep, but his body felt the need to purge itself of something foul.

The feline flinched as Shae's voice cut through the fog of his troubling thoughts. He looked up with watery eyes that refused to cry. "Your brother, apparently." He flipped a hand and put his head back down. "Said he'd kill me if I hurt you. Good to know there's never a shortage on people volunteering to end me, makes life a bit more interesting." His tone was bitter and a bit muffled from his face being buried in the crook of his arm. There was a moment of pause, before Ndale slowly lifted his head, not looking at the other boy.

"Thing is, I fear that I will hurt you eventually, in some way, shape or form." His eyes narrowed on something off in the distance that he apparently had a dislike for. "Or that I already have...like tonight or what happened after the shower-" He cut himself short and sighed. Maybe...maybe he needed to leave? Where could he go? ...Africa?

[Shae-Lantern]

Shae's brow creased slightly and his expression became more confused.
"Brother?... I don't have a brother... whoever it was you must have misinterpreted or something.."
It was true.. wasn't it?
he didn't have a brother.. since when did he have a brother- no if he'd.. he would have known about it before now.
He was unnerved further though by how Ndale was still acting.
It made him worry.
he didn't even quite no why, but it made him worry.

"Hurt me..?"
His eyebrows furrowed further still and he shook his head.
"Don't be dumb.. how did that hurt me? I don't understand.. Ndale?" he crouched down and went onto his knees in front of the older boy. "Hey Ndale, I don't understand... you're not hurting me.. it's my fault, everything was my fault. I.... I was the one who made you upset.. I'll try harder now.. be.. be a better boyfriend.. right?"
He was now unsure of where all the words were coming from, but seeing the other guy like this just seemed to make them come out of him without him actually thinking first. Like, simply because it was what needed to be said..
It was true enough for the situation as well..

He'd try harder to please Ndale.
Because for some reason whenever he didn't please Ndale, he felt awful.
He had to please him in order to remain happy himself.. that much was obvious.
It was kinda annoying too- but there was nothing he could do..
he had become dependent on this one person for happiness..

[Ndale]

The cheetah flicked his eyes to Shae, brow creasing in confusion.

"You sure? Little kid, white hair, admittedly very cute. Something about him almost looks like you too. He came here looking for me by name, gestured in here, saying that I better not hurt his brother, that he was very fragile and important to him. That you two had been through a lot together and he knew you better than anyone." Ndale's look gained a small hint of bitter anger. "For now, he's letting me remain close to you if I so choose..." He trailed off, obviously grumpy.

Casting a long look at Shae, Ndale's expression remained passive. He unbent his knees, legs lowering, and he leaned forward to cup a hand around the back of Shae's neck and guide him to come forwards, the action firm but very gentle.

"That's silly. How was it your fault? I was asking too much, I'm still asking too much." Amber eyes were bright and trained on the other's boy's face, standing out against the emotionless expression they were set in. "Don't work harder to please me Shae, don't change. If you'd let me, I'd take all of you. You have to tell me no." He paused. "In fact, you told me that I could have this time after the ball to have you however I want. Well, I want you to take that control back. I want you to assert yourself and tell me what you want. Got it?" His eyes narrowed, being perfectly serious. "Tell me the truth."

[Shae-Lantern]

Shae shook his head slightly.
"no.. That doesn't ring any bells.. I'm certain you or he has been mistaken because I haven't GOT a brother" he spoke in an insistent tone, just how on earth was that possible?
It wasn't.
It couldn't be- it made no sense.

He went forward automatically as he was guided, offering no resistance.
But this also made no sense- hadn't Ndale been.. Furious? Just a moment earlier?
He was still hesitant to test that fact.
"you.. You're not angry.. With me.. Anymore?" the question came out slowly and his hesitance showed in his voice. What DID he want anyway? Now that the question was asked- but so suddenly- he wasn't quite sure. Then again he rarely was. So many things he could say.. But then he just couldn't seem to pick out any of them.
"I.. Don't know.. I don't really know.. And.. Thats the truth."
He looked almost apologetic, but also confused.
"why do I have to say no?..... Why can't I just let you..?"
Why couldn't he?
The was definitely a part of him that truly wished to..

((sorry I immunize did it and I haven't been in chat- my computer wouldn't connect to the Internet all day today.. I'm on my phone now because IT just got Internet but.. Yeah.. Sorry.. And sorry to everyone else.. I promised myself I'd finish my replies today but I can't >>))
So... why couldn't he?

[Ndale]

"Tch." Ndale made an annoyed noise and his canines clicked as he snapped his teeth together in irritation. "Annoying brat. I don't know who else he could have been talking about, it's not like I'm currently sleeping with anyone else." He rolled his eyes and shook his head lightly. Whatever then, he could disregard the kid, not like it mattered much anyway.

Because of the lack of resistance, Ndale moved to pull Shae in further, but there was a twinge at his shoulder that gave him pause. He stayed silent as Shae answered honestly, staring, and eventually sighed.
"Angry? I'm infuriated. At you, no." Ignoring the smart in his bicep, he pulled Shae even closer, leaning to place a kiss on his forehead.

"If you...want to let me...that is up to you. I just want to know that you are able to tell me when you are against something and when you want me to stop. I wonder if you realize how much I crave you in entirety, and how willing you are to give it." He gave, glancing off to the side and trying a smirk. "Lets have everything willing now, I'm really not in to forcing young boys to lay with me, after all." He gave a light snicker, then paused, thinking.

"Tomorrow...I am going to ask Od about possibly sending me back to Africa, just...as an option." He shrugged and didn't specify an option for what, because he really didn't know. It was just that, an option... One he thought Shae should know he was willing to take should he have to leave for whatever reason, whether that be Shae wanting him to leave, or if he needed to run from physco, homicidal little white-haired kids....

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